Gardening and vino…

212
23
Boys and Girls,
 
You may disagree with the will of the gods, but Bachus must have me  listed in his good books out of the taxes I have paid for my vino.
 
SWMBO went out and marked all the weeds in the garden

that needed to be removed and after a session of vino indulging, I ventured out into the jungle in my thongs (not the “G”, but the flip flops). Mucho agro got the better of me and I resorted to physical violence to drag the bugger, out by his teeth.
 
Slipped, stumbled, cartwheeled and rolled over the rocks,
close to a precipisse,
 
that could have claimed my doom.
 
Gathering my wits off the ground, I realised that thanks to the gods, my lack of sobriety preventend me from greeting the ground with cordial engagement that may have been a lasting impression in more congenial break throughs.
 
Examining my wounds, 
I feel that the ground had the better advantage,
 
And after copious amounts of antiseptic Savlon, I decided to get back to considering sticking to puzzle posting.
 
The moral of this story is to keep out of fucking gardens… and drink vino instead.  

If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

23 Comments

Oh no! That's gotta hurt!
I hope healing goes well (and quickly)

 Steve Rasmussen
 commented 43 minutes ago
Oh no! That's gotta hurt!
I hope healing goes well (and quickly)

2 vinos and no pain! 

1 vino and I have to clean up (with pain).

When you get to my age, this is a daily event...  I have no idea how 987 (Ron) fares. 

If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

FAIW, I'm not crying "poor me".... I'm touting " bugger gardening"!

If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

duck hire a real gardener and stay safe my ducking !!!!!

working with my hands is a joy,it gives me a sense of fulfillment,somthing so many seek and so few find.-SAM MALOOF.


 Pottz
 commented about 4 hours ago
new
duck hire a real gardener and stay safe my ducking !!!!!

The shekel direction would go the wrong way... I had considered to sell my garden which could have given me cash in the pocket, but the bloody prospective buyer wanted me to move out!!!... and leave my Fe$tool?????

Spa/vino and NRL time... bi!... Go Storm!

If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD


EEK!  Bloody chems and raw wounds are not a friendly mix... maybe I should hold back on that HCIO4!

If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

Final time... UGH!.... The loss was worse than the sting!

If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

Duck

We lost more than one member retrieving a golf ball and fell on the rocks.  Tend to those wounds.  If swelling, go to ER.


Petey

Looks like a good reason to stay inside.     Bruises will show up later.    Poor weed got the worst.

Ron

Ouch! Go easy their buddy! The rocks never lose…

Ryan/// ~sigh~ I blew up another bowl. Moke told me "I made the inside bigger than the outside".

Duckster--Good God, Never Garden and Drink!  That should be your motto!  
On another note, there doe not appear to be much blood for an injury of that magnitude....did vino come from your wounds?  Do you still have circulation?  Take care fo yourself, my friend, we need you.

Mike

Maybe pants and real type of footwear might of helped
Thanks guys.... this was not posted to solicit sympathy or anti-alcohol sentiments... it was designed to warn people of the perils of gardening... leave that for the gnomes.


 Corelz125
 commented about 7 hours ago
new
Maybe pants and real type of footwear might of helped

The pink boots would have protected the toenails, and the hero nightie (not that bloody blue civi)  might have made me invincible.

If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

Might of had better traction with the pink boots
Holy cow! I can do that fall with no alcohol, though. Hope you feel better, soon! I have strike marks all over my forearms like a septuagenarian prizefighter, myself. If I die walking down the street, the police are going to think that they are defensive wounds and look for assailants.

Could be worse. I'm a member of a metal working forum that had a member who was pulling some plant out of the ground and when it released more easily than expected, fell backwards, hit his head and died from his injuries. #HireYoungPeopleToPullWeeds

Steven- Random Orbital Nailer

Vengeance is sweet, snuck up on the bastard,
and extolled satisfaction,

however, one wonders who won that scrap.... nearly go decapitated by a low flying branch,

without a pilot's license.   The pink boots came out of hybernation,

for the reign dance (it started to rain) and celebrate the demise of the culprit and his accomplice.

FAIW, that bloody branch also had a blue tape on it that I decided to remove a while back.

If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD

Man when you attack those rocks, you mean business!. Put a little vino on those cuts and they'll heal faster...kinda like the "hair of the dog"

Cheers, Jim ........................ Variety is the spice of life...............Learn something new every day

Gotta respect Australia, even the rocks are out to kill you!

I have a few nemesis bushes int the yard I've been trying to kill, but they fight back. Damage is mostly scratches and thorn punctures.

Take care of that bark LBD! 
Don't want it to get all soft 'n' chewy. Dry and crusty makes for good picking and means It is healing up proper. 

 SplinterGroup
..... Take care of that bark LBD!.... 

Thanks Splinter.

UNfortunately I can count on one hand the number of days per year I don't have festering wounds on my shins.  For an old fart I cut/scrape/bruise easily with copious amount of claret.... however, after the red sets in (2 days after)

and the bed sheets weigh a ton, it dissipates fairly quickly and I seem to heal fast (and well).

I repeat again that this was not a plea for sympathy... but my stance against gardening.... weeds rule!

If your first cut is too short... Take the second cut from the longer end... LBD